Question from a reader

I had a question about couples with an age
difference...among other things : )

I am 26 and my fiance is 42 (never married, no kids),
we got engaged in 2003, I set the date a year later
and we are getting married this September.  I can't
say I have been excited about getting married, when I
got engaged I was freaked out!  I do love him, we are
so compatible, he is fun, thoughtful, trustworthy,
etc -- everything I have looked for in a guy.  But
lately I have been really worrying and am full of
anxiety and doubt.  We shouldn't have moved in together
so soon (we did this in 2003)--I don't think we were
ready for the pressures it brought.  I don't think we
handled them in the best way.  I am afraid of growing,
because I know I still have a lot of that to do, and am
worried about what that will do to our relationship.
I am also afraid that I never felt that it was the
right time for me to get married--I always wanted the
perfect career before the guy.  I don't want to let
him go because he is such a great guy and is willing
to work on things.  I sometimes feel that he loves me
more than I love him, but I have been in a very
unhealthy/abusive relationship before in which I
"loved hard" and didn't get much in return except for
heartache and that lasted seven years--I never wanted
to put myself into a situation like that again.  It
upsets me that we are entering into marriage in a
different stage of life, not the passionate type, but
the best friend, we made it four years type.  Am I
worrying for nothing?  Or am I dealing with some
serious problems here? 

posted by Heather and Dan @ 8:47 PM